I stared at this sign in a deli window for a while yesterday, because I use my time well. Notice it doesn’t say a price, the “limited time offer” is just “Pizza Slice.” And it’s subject to availability, so they might not have it. But it’s definitely too good a deal not to advertise about: I had some, obviously, because I enjoy pizza that’s really defensive before I’ve asked it a question.... 

I’m still not entirely positive who Dita Von Teese is or why I see her on the internet a lot, I just know she’s a person who wears slightly less clothing and is slightly more attractive than the average human being. Here’s Dita pouring sparkling water on her cleavage because you just rolled Perrier on your Perrier dice. Doesn’t that happen all the time with those dice? Questions for another day. This message co-sponsored... 

The Alyssa Milano/Old Spice Guy flirtation continues – watch as Milano, dressed in a towel in her bathroom, videotapes a response to the Old Spice guy, saying, “Here is your next move. You must make a $100,000 donation to the National Wildlife Federations Gulf Oil Spill Restoration Fund. Are you strong enough?” Will @OldSpice rise to Alyssa’s challenge?  Read More →

The Old Spice guy, Isaiah Mustafa, is back for a new Old Spice commercial (video)… and it’s every bit as brilliant as the first in this campaign. Lovin’ it!  Read More →

Who wouldn’t vote for a political candidate who has the ability to meet with George Washington , Samuel Adams , and Ben Franklin in an empty sports bar and rile them up so much, they look at the Constitution baffled and ultimately decide that it’s time to go to war? George Washington is so pissed! Where was this scene in the John Adams miniseries? NOWHERE, that’s where. How convenient, you Emmy winner for MOST COMMUNIST MINISERIES.... 

First, Shrek asked us to drink his mint ogre load — now he wants us to taste his creamy green filling ? You may be overestimating how much we love Shrek , Shrek. I mean, I loved Up , but if the old man came out with Twinkies filled…I’ll… I’ll just stop.  Read More →

Newly crowned American Idol winner Lee Dewyze is going to Disney World! Check Lee singing “When You Wish Upon a Star” in this commercial video clip. Dewyze will be at Disney World on Monday.  Read More →

Irish potato chip manufacturers Hunky Dory have received more than 20 complaints over the following innuendo-laced ad campaign sponsoring Irish rugby. See if you can spot what they complained about: I don’t get it. It would be a double entendre if anyone had ever referred to boobs as “crisps,” but as we all know, over there, they call boobs “kilometres”. I imagine the people who are complaining are also upset with... 

Check out the Lane Bryant ad that was banned by Fox and ABC in this video. Apparently, the Lane Bryant ad was too racy for the likes of airing during shows like “Dancing with the Stars.” Um… what?! First, has ABC noticed some of the costumes the women wear on DWTS? And second… what about Victoria’s Secret ads, which also feature women in their lingerie? Lane Bryant’s Inside Curve blog …  Read More →

It’s been a great day for baseball-related unintentional humour, between the Scott Stapp Marlins song , the Chan Ho Park “diarrhea” interview , and the following ad for “Pro Toast”, in which three hot girls and some dude look up at toast with baseball logos on it as if to say, “Holy motherf***ing s*** Pro Toast!!!!!!!!!!!!” “When you’re a kid, everything makes you happy, but as you get older,... 

When I read “Japanese” and “commercial” on the internet, I immediately prepare myself for a video of dancing cartoon squids high fiving skateboarding Britney lookalikes in a jungle of penis, but this oddly touching Japanese condom commercial may just have a shot at the Best Foreign Film Oscar next year: Not to be nit-picky, but I think if the couple hugging counts as “0 mm”, then having sex through a 0.02 mm... 

Sweet! Toys R Us sells laser sights for rifles now. I was just thinking to myself, why doesn’t Toys R us sell laser sights for rifles? I’m gonna write a novel called “See I Told You So, About Those Rifle Sights”: Back in mah day, con sarnit, Toys R Us just sold uh buncha TOY guns, then you’d walk down the girls’ aisle by mistake and see all the pink and purple and be like “Oh crap…  Read More →

If you missed it, check out the first Apple iPad commercial that aired during the 2010 Academy Awards in this Oscars ad video.  Read More →

Want to hug your loved one this Valentine’s Day, but you just can’t manage to get in the same room as them to do so? Now, you can send them something that is literally the exact same thing with the new Hug-E-Gram , a pair of inanimate arms you can mail to your special someone so they can wrap it around themselves and try really hard to delude themselves into believing it’s something resembling a hug: The website …  Read More →

Any time I receive emails from Myspace , I feel like I’m being contacted by a delusional ex-girlfriend who I wasn’t even that into in the first place and now doesn’t realize it’s been over for three years. This awkwardness is compounded when Myspace starts offering me suggestions about what I should be doing for Valentine’s Day: Why yes, Myspace, I would like to spend my Valentine’s Day going to dinner with...